As musicians we have to interact with many types of people. Building good working relationships is essential to our profession. Most musicians build each other up personally and professionally. Unfortunately, just like any other profession we run into toxic people.
I have learned that toxic people can take many shapes. I place these types of people into three categories: The Bully, The Perfectionist, and The Martyr, but all three of these people use manipulation to get their needs met whether it is intentional or unintentional. I’m sure we have all come into contact with these types of people, and have fallen victim to them. Being a musician, we have to be careful about toxic relationships, they can take a serious toll on us and worse be a serious detriment to our career.
Below is my advice on how to deal with a toxic person so you can stay a happy musician:
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Listen to your gut: You can’t quite put your finger on it, but your gut says ”I don’t think I should be working with this person” Listen to your instinct, it’s usually right.
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Don’t take it personally: Toxic people treat everyone the same way. It’s THEM not YOU. Some people don’t even realize they are being toxic. Taking it personally not only leaves you open to be manipulated, but also takes away your focus and energy reserved for your music.
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Dump the skunk: You know that person that sprays resistance and negativity all over your progress? Don’t try to change them, Let them go. Although they look cute and cuddly their spray of negativity is harsh and difficult to get rid of.
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Practice self-care: Toxic people can be very draining, you may not be able to escape them. Take time every day to center yourself, remember your purpose, and the joy of being a musician.
Having these types of people around can be contagious and very distracting. That’s why it’s important to recognize the signs and remove these people from your life or find healthy ways to deal with these kinds of people. When you’re a happy person; you will be a happy musician and happiness opens the door to all kinds of wonderful opportunities.
What do you do to deal with toxic people?
Your Happy Musician Candace
www.thehappymusician.com
